“authenticity:…”

“knowing who you are and being brave enough to live it…”

How fitting. The past few months have not been the easiest.

There have been lots of changes in my life. All good. But of course with good, there are challenges.

The adaptability of the people around me because of these changes has not been as easy as I would have hoped, but it has taught me a lot.

One. If people really care about you, they will adapt to the changes in your life. They will cheer for you. They will be proud of your accomplishments.

Two. There will always be people who act jealous when things are going well for you and there is really nothing  you can do to change that.

What makes me unique, what drives me and what pushes me to be my best self is different from the next person and is what makes me, me. It is tough to be you, to be unique to be “authentic” in today’s world. There is so much judgement, so much competition and such little support.

While I do love a little competition, I do not agree with the unsupported nature of others. Being competitive is meant to bring out your best. But most are competitive not to be the best they can be, but to bring down those that are rising above trying to be their best selves.

People may be competitive by nature, but I also believe we are naturally supportive.

From the loss, heartache, and challenges I have faced, I have learned to embrace each others strengths and weaknesses. To embrace what makes us different and to strive to be our best selves because of our differences.

I use to want to hide everything that differentiated me from others. So concerned with those that judged me, would talk about me, laugh about everything that makes me, me. I then realized that these are things that make me stand out and define who I am. If someone does not like these things, then too bad. I am me, and I am proud of who I am.

I am a good person. I am a kind person. I love with my whole heart. I care with all that I have. I embrace others and all they have to offer. I am authentic, and so are you.

I use to want to hide all that made me different from those around me. I wanted to be like everyone else, until i realized being like everyone else meant that I wasn’t me.

Today I am proud to be authentic. I am proud to be brave enough to embrace who I am and all that I stand for. I am proud to surround myself with people who are brave enough to be themselves and never deny themselves the ability to show the world who they are.

xoxo,

to being authentic.

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having a big heart

I read an article today. It was titled “Don’t Apologize for Having a Big Heart.”

It really got me thinking, because I sincerely related to this article.

It spoke of being affected and attached to people. It spoke of falling without holding back.

When I care about someone, I ALWAYS do this.

Maybe I am falling for you as a friend, a lover, a mentor, a mentee. Whatever it may be, I always fall hard. I am affected by all around me, even those I do not “fall” for, I do still get attached.

I will not apologize for this and neither should you.

Having a big heart, a heart of gold, is what makes you who you are.

You are a wonderful person and there is no reason to change who you are.

Some people may get overwhelmed by your attachment or quick commitment to the relationship you share (whatever that may be).

Just because they get overwhelmed does not mean you should apologize for this.

Some people may put a wall up when you start to connect to them. This is because they are scared of the connection, not because there is anything wrong with you. Help them become comfortable with the connection by being proud of the person you are and loving even more.

Those of us with big hearts do not love everyone, but the ones we do love, we love hard and we value them.

Having a big heart means we are in touch with our emotions, we know how to relate and connect to others. We know when to embrace and hold back. We know when to sympathize. We know when to advise or listen. We just know what they need because we have allowed ourselves to connect deeply.

Most of all we know how to protect. We protect the people in our lives. We shelter them and let them fall around us whenever they may need to. The people in our lives know they can lean on us, confide in us and no matter what we will not judge and will continue to love them.

So please, never apologize for having a big heart. Understand that for some this may be difficult to accept. Some people cannot share and spread their emotions and love as easily, but that does not mean we are wrong in doing so.

Always love BIG, DEEPLY and without EXPECTATION.

xoxo,

to those of us with big hearts.

The World is Gray

grey

The world is most definitely not black and white. But, is it really gray? Or is it full of colour. Maybe violet, blue, orange, pink, whatever colour  you want it to be.

We create our own universe. We paint a sky from our emotions, energy and the attitude we display.

The way we feel, the way we treat people and how we express ourselves. That is really the colour we paint our world.

Time and time again, I express to people that the world is not black and white. There is not always a right and a wrong. Yes, murder, theft, and deceit are all “wrong” but, that is not what I am talking about.

I am talking about morals, beliefs, actions, feelings. Those are not black and white and there are most definitely not right and wrong answers to these.

We are all different. Each of these have a unique meaning to everyone. No one can dictate these.

Yes we are influenced, but our feelings deep down in our gut, in our hearts – that is developed from a young age until we are old, wrinkly and grey!

This all leads to why the the next statement is so important.

Are you ready? It’s so simple, yet so forgotten.

Be YOU!!!

If I can instill anything on you, it has to be that.

Make decisions that you feel good about!

Make choices that define who you are.

Do not let others tell you what these must be. Because I have a big secret to share with you, a secret that we are all aware of but we do not act on. If we cannot be our best selves, make choices that push us further, make sacrifices that make us better people, and take action to be happy, we cannot inspire, demonstrate love or help others be their best selves!

If we can channel all this. Find what makes us happy and push forward to be the amazing individuals we are, then we can help those around us be their best selves.

So how I do be my best self?

I eat healthy 6 out of 7 days a week, I work out at least 6 out of 7 days a week. But I do enjoy a glass of wine on a Friday or Saturday night. I do allow myself to pause my workouts and then press start again. But I don’t allow myself to give up.

I utilize methods of personal development to feed my mind. Books, quotes, interactions with new people and “me” time.

I give my body AND mind what it needs to be the best I can be.

With this, I encourage others to be their best selves. Not because I think I know best, but because I believe in each and every person I encounter.

We are all capable of being AMAZING and no one should have to tell you that, but with the way society is, I know that someone needs to. So I am that someone.

All I want is for you to accomplish your dreams, the goals you think are impossible.  I want to help you along the way, but I also want you to help me.

Because the world isn’t black and white, but it also isn’t gray.

The world is all kinds of colours.

We all make up this wonderful world around us and contribute to the many aspects of it. So shine what ever colour makes you, you.

Make the choices that push you ahead, not because you want to be better than someone else but because you want to be proud of who you are!

We are all here to rock it, so let’s cheer for each other when we’re up, but also when we’re down.

Remember, never forget you are awesome because whether you are purple, yellow, red, gold, whatever colour you believe you are, whatever colour you choose to be, you are amazing and no one can take that away from you!

XOXO,

Your personal cheerleader