if..

Today I saw a quote, “If life can remove someone you never dreamed of losing, it can replace them with someone you never dreamt of having.”

We often hold on to those that at one point touched a part of our lives. Or maybe we are still holding on to the part they touched and letting go is extremely difficult. But, we must remember that if that person at one point gave us a reason to consider removing them from our lives, then there is a reason for this.

If ever a person makes you question why they are a part of your life, you should question why you want to continue to allow them to be a part of your life.

Each and every one of us are too special to let those that do not see our worth be a part of our lives. When you love someone, care about them, feel connected to them, it is almost impossible to see the “bad” parts of them. If there are parts of a person that you can dream of losing then you need to question if they really deserve to be a part of you.

If you ever wonder if there is any one or any thing out there that you could not even dream of having, then trust there is. Trust that you deserve better then you can ever imagine. Because if you can imagine it, then you can find it.

More importantly, stop wondering if..

Stop asking if..

Stop waiting for if..

Remember that you ARE important..

You DO deserve the best..

And if you are wondering if the best is yet come, then it WILL come.

Most importantly, remember that whenever you are questioning what is around you and wondering what else is out there – that is your heart, your instincts, telling you that what you have now is not what is meant for you.

So keep dreaming, keep reaching and wait for all the wonderful things coming your way. Because you deserve the best and never settle for less.

xoxo,

to stop wondering if

Advertisements

Silence.

Do any of you have a hard time keeping silent?

For so long I kept quiet about how I felt. Whether the words of another person hurt me. Or maybe noticing the judging eyes of others. I often stayed quiet. I avoided sharing my opinions and would often just agree with those around me. Then one day I realized, I was hurting myself in doing so.

Our words and actions are the way in which we can express ourselves. It has taken me a long time, a lot of hurt, a lot of sadness and a lot of struggles, but over the past two years, I have found my voice. I have learned that sometimes there is strength in silence, while other times there is strength in our words.

I read a quote that stated “Our silence says just as much about your character as your words do.” My interpretation of this is that there are times to be silent and times to speak, both have meaningful impacts. Those who have gotten to know me, know that I will express how I feel. I try to guide those around me in the right direction, call you out when you are wrong, most importantly admit when I am wrong, especially to those I care about most.

Because I have learned to express myself so freely with my words, when I am silent, that tends to create the biggest impact.

If I am choosing to be silent, to shy away from those closest to me, know it is for a reason. My silence is always purposeful. Possibly I need time to reflect. Or maybe I am at the point where I do not believe you are deserving of my words. Regardless, I have realized that by being silent maybe I am not being silent at all, but expressing even more with less.

Recognize that the words you share or do not share impact those around you and speak multitudes of your character. You do not need to say many words or any at all to show the world who you are. Choosing the right times to speak and the rights times to be quiet will speak wonders and impact each and every person around you.

Shout to the skies as necessary and find that quiet and cozy corner when needed. But, always stay true to you and share with the world the beautiful character you withhold.

xoxo,

to your inner you.

“authenticity:…”

“knowing who you are and being brave enough to live it…”

How fitting. The past few months have not been the easiest.

There have been lots of changes in my life. All good. But of course with good, there are challenges.

The adaptability of the people around me because of these changes has not been as easy as I would have hoped, but it has taught me a lot.

One. If people really care about you, they will adapt to the changes in your life. They will cheer for you. They will be proud of your accomplishments.

Two. There will always be people who act jealous when things are going well for you and there is really nothing  you can do to change that.

What makes me unique, what drives me and what pushes me to be my best self is different from the next person and is what makes me, me. It is tough to be you, to be unique to be “authentic” in today’s world. There is so much judgement, so much competition and such little support.

While I do love a little competition, I do not agree with the unsupported nature of others. Being competitive is meant to bring out your best. But most are competitive not to be the best they can be, but to bring down those that are rising above trying to be their best selves.

People may be competitive by nature, but I also believe we are naturally supportive.

From the loss, heartache, and challenges I have faced, I have learned to embrace each others strengths and weaknesses. To embrace what makes us different and to strive to be our best selves because of our differences.

I use to want to hide everything that differentiated me from others. So concerned with those that judged me, would talk about me, laugh about everything that makes me, me. I then realized that these are things that make me stand out and define who I am. If someone does not like these things, then too bad. I am me, and I am proud of who I am.

I am a good person. I am a kind person. I love with my whole heart. I care with all that I have. I embrace others and all they have to offer. I am authentic, and so are you.

I use to want to hide all that made me different from those around me. I wanted to be like everyone else, until i realized being like everyone else meant that I wasn’t me.

Today I am proud to be authentic. I am proud to be brave enough to embrace who I am and all that I stand for. I am proud to surround myself with people who are brave enough to be themselves and never deny themselves the ability to show the world who they are.

xoxo,

to being authentic.

soulmates

From day one we are exposed to the media, peers, mentors, etc. who tell us we must find our soulmate. We must find the one that captures our soul, the person we are destined to be with and that to have our happy ever after we MUST find this person

But what does it truly mean to meet your soulmate?

What actually does soulmate mean…?

To start; I do not believe that what soulmate means to me is the same meaning to you. The way we interpret love and connection, the way we experience life, differs from person to person.

So how can anyone tell us what it means to meet your soulmate? How can anyone tell us that this person is the person we are meant to spend our lives with?

I have experienced heartache, triumph, love, failure and everything in between in my short 25 years and the one thing I can promise you, is that nothing is certain and what you feel comes from within. No one can predict or tell you exactly what may occur.

I have learned that nothing is permanent. You cannot predict the future. You may find your “soulmate” today and this may change tomorrow. This is why I believe that we do not have just one soulmate.

One soulmate; that only means that our lives are changed by just one individual.

My life has been changed by so many. Impacted by so many. Influenced by so many.

This is why I believe that we have many soulmates.

Each one of them impact us differently. Each one holds a unique place in our hearts. Each one helps us grow into our best self.

I believe we are meant to connect with people deeply.

Have you ever walked into a room and felt a persons presence? Known when they were looking in your direction? Have you ever felt a persons stare from across the room?

I bet you have not felt that from just one individual in your life.

That feeling you get when you can feel another persons energy is amazing.

You may feel this with only one person or you may feel this with many people throughout your life. Whether it is with one person or ten it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that in that moment, at that specific point in your life, that person is the most important person, if only for a second.

I have come to realize that we must show people the importance they hold in our lives, if only for a moment. Do not take the special ones for granted, because they are special for a reason.

I have also come to realize that soulmate means something different to all of us.

To me, it means a person that captures my soul. A person that draws me in. A person that I think of often. A person that I hope to always be a part of my life and that I would do anything to keep.

But at the end of they day we have to remember to not allow the world around us to define what a soulmate should be. A soulmate should be whatever it is we want them to be.

xoxo,

to finding many soulmates

STOP waiting for friday

STOP

We often wait for Friday. For Summer. For Birthday’s. For Christmas.

We are waiting so often that we forget to live in the moment.

Do you realize how many moments pass us by that are life altering, exciting and memorable because we are waiting for Friday?

Why do we even wait for Friday?

Is it because society has deemed Friday to be a ‘good’ day. Why can’t anything great Happen Monday-Thursday?

Have you ever noticed that when you are waiting for something it rarely happens?

Not only does it rarely happen, but think back to the saying “a watched pot never boils” the longer you ‘watch’ or wait for something to happen, the longer it takes for it to happen. Stop waiting for greatness to be achieved, for happiness to take place, to fall in love..

Start living life one day at a time, set goals you can accomplish little by little, day by day, stop focusing on the end but focus on the progress that occurs as each day passes.

When you start living in the now, you will start appreciating life’s small accomplishments. You will start being HAPPY.

I am a true believer that lack of happiness is often associated with looking so far ahead that we miss all of life’s blessing that are right in front of us.

We forget to appreciate ‘the little things’ because we are so focused on the ‘BIG THINGS’. But we must not forget that it is the little things that make up the big things.

It is the small steps we take each day.

That smile from a stranger.

The touch of another human.

The conquering of step 1 of our goal.

The connection with a new place.

Each and every feeling that passes through us, guides us towards happiness.

So STOP WAITING and start living.

XOXO,

to embracing the little things

the best year yet..

25 has been the best year yet.

The day after my birthday someone had said to me that 25 would be a good year. I honestly thought sure.. I already felt I had my life in order. I have a good job, I am a home owner, and I was starting to get a pretty good routine with my fitness and nutrition.

Shortly after this conversation, I had a mindset change, completely unrelated to that conversation, it was just something I had decided was necessary.

So I began to exhibit and exude a positive energy.

Eliminate those that were negatively impacting my life and bringing me down.

I began to attract positive people into my life and make choices that impacted me positively as well.

This doesn’t mean I am perfect, I still make mistakes, sometimes I am sad or angry, but for the most part I have turned my mindset almost an entire 180.

And I must admit, that person was right. 25 has been a really good year. The best year.

I finally know who I am, and the person I want to be. I go after what I want and I let nothing hold me back.  I allow myself to love, be honest, and connect with people and again I do not hold back. I am not ashamed to share my thoughts or feelings and I own all my thoughts and feelings.

I have progressed in my career, and I have progressed personally. I have so much to look forward to and so much to embrace over the next 18 months.

More than this, I fully intend to continue to strive to be more successful. There are so many more dreams that I want to chase and goals to crush.

“I want to go on a road trip someday. Alone or with someone I love…” I want to chase my dreams, chase the sun and watch the clouds. I want to listen to my favourite albums, sing along to my favourite lyrics and dance freely. I want to meet new people. I want to love new people. I want to connect with the world, with the places I go and with the people around me. I want to make memories with myself and make memories with those I meet along the way. “I want to feel alive..”

I am so excited for future years, because I truly believe that with positive thinking that good karma will come around and I will continue to see personal growth and continue to reach my goals.

I hope that I will find others that want to join me on my journey and are willing to embrace me and themselves. Together we can create new memories, go on adventures and fulfill our greatest dreams.

xoxo,

to the best year yet.

your flaws are perfect..

I read a quote today, “Your flaws are perfect for the heart that is meant to love you.”

This can be applied much beyond your “significant other” that does or will love you. This should be applied to all of those in your life.

We are all made up flaws, and perfection. We all hold traits that are viewed as perfect to others, and traits that may be viewed as completely imperfect.

It is when our imperfections draw people in that reveals those that truly love us.

When I think about those that matter most to me, as much as they may drive me crazy, confuse me, irritate me and at times make me want to scream, I love them. I unconditionally, and undoubtedly LOVE them.

I would go to the end of the earth for them and even when they make a mess of my kitchen and leave dishes unwashed, I cannot help but love them to pieces.

I have come to the realization of a couple things on my journey to living a happier and healthier life.

The first is that I do not want people in my life if they cannot accept that I am not perfect. Sometimes I am annoying, sometimes I make mistakes. But I will love you wholeheartedly and I would go to the end of the earth for you if you are a part of my tribe. If I am speaking honestly, I quite possibly would, even if you are not.

Secondly, once I stopped focusing on my imperfections and over thinking every word and action I made, I started to love myself. I started to embrace my flaws and set positive goals. I then started recognizing the triumphs and my progress started become much more evident.

I realized that my flaws are perfect. They are a part of who I am. There are many things about me that are imperfect. But I am loving, caring, honest, and always ready to embrace others. Most of all, I am willing to accept others flaws and not judge others for their imperfections, but see them as unique characteristics of that individual.

It’s not always easy, I have bad days that I cannot help but notice my flaws, but most days I embrace them and move forward.

You should to.

Because your flaws are perfect. Because your flaws make you, you. Because your flaws will attract the people that will love you unconditionally.

xoxo,

to being flawsome.

having a big heart

I read an article today. It was titled “Don’t Apologize for Having a Big Heart.”

It really got me thinking, because I sincerely related to this article.

It spoke of being affected and attached to people. It spoke of falling without holding back.

When I care about someone, I ALWAYS do this.

Maybe I am falling for you as a friend, a lover, a mentor, a mentee. Whatever it may be, I always fall hard. I am affected by all around me, even those I do not “fall” for, I do still get attached.

I will not apologize for this and neither should you.

Having a big heart, a heart of gold, is what makes you who you are.

You are a wonderful person and there is no reason to change who you are.

Some people may get overwhelmed by your attachment or quick commitment to the relationship you share (whatever that may be).

Just because they get overwhelmed does not mean you should apologize for this.

Some people may put a wall up when you start to connect to them. This is because they are scared of the connection, not because there is anything wrong with you. Help them become comfortable with the connection by being proud of the person you are and loving even more.

Those of us with big hearts do not love everyone, but the ones we do love, we love hard and we value them.

Having a big heart means we are in touch with our emotions, we know how to relate and connect to others. We know when to embrace and hold back. We know when to sympathize. We know when to advise or listen. We just know what they need because we have allowed ourselves to connect deeply.

Most of all we know how to protect. We protect the people in our lives. We shelter them and let them fall around us whenever they may need to. The people in our lives know they can lean on us, confide in us and no matter what we will not judge and will continue to love them.

So please, never apologize for having a big heart. Understand that for some this may be difficult to accept. Some people cannot share and spread their emotions and love as easily, but that does not mean we are wrong in doing so.

Always love BIG, DEEPLY and without EXPECTATION.

xoxo,

to those of us with big hearts.

time doesn’t heal everything..

Despite what we are told, time does not heal everything.

That doesn’t mean this is a negative statement. In fact, for me, this is positive.

Time has not healed the hurt I experienced, but time has taught me to embrace it.

We all encounter traumatic events in our lives. What is traumatic for me, may not be traumatic for you. But, we all face traumatic events, this I am sure of.

We have events that challenge us, make us question our beliefs and morals, make us question our strength. Time may not heal all hurt, but it does make us stronger.

With time, we learn to live through the pain.

With time, we learn how to move forward despite the days we want to so badly give up.

With time, we learn how to grow stronger.

No matter how many minutes, hours, days, years have passed, I have never stopped hurting. But I have learned how to take that pain and create positive energy from it.

I have learned how to take the pain and use it to build up others and push myself to be better despite it.

I have learned to hide the pain, not always, but most days. I have learned to forget about my pain and help others with theirs. I have learned how to turn my pain into strength.

I never realized how strong I was until I had to wake up, live life, and move forward despite the deep desire to stay hidden in my room.

I also never realized how strong I was until I loved others deeply despite my fear of experiencing the heartache from one single day. To be able to love when you know how it feels to have not only your world, but your heart shattered is true strength.

Realizing my strength and being proud of it has been a difficult journey. A difficult journey that I am so proud of how much I have overcome. It has not been an easy journey but it has been amazing and I have realized both my strengths and weaknesses.

True strength can only be realized when we identify our weaknesses.

But, time does not always heal. I still hurt. I still wonder. I still cry.

I will never stop hurting, wondering or crying. But, I will draw from all of this and push forward.

I will push forward and push those around me to move forward as well.

Because time does not always heal but it does build strength.

xoxo,

to being stronger.

life is about…

This will be different for each of us.

BUT.. the actual conclusion of what “Life is about..” should result in the same thoughts for us all.

Life is about doing the things that make us happy, make the people we love happy, and push us to our limits.

For me life is about “trusting my feelings, taking risks, losing and finding happiness, appreciating the memories, learning from the past, and realizing people change.”

I saw this quote and all I could think about was how true this was to me.

Over the past year, I have learned to trust my feelings. I will feel and love on my own accord. No one will influence this. I will love you because I choose to love you, I will dislike you because I choose to dislike you. No one will influence these feelings. I will share these feelings. I will express how I feel, and I will not be ashamed of my feelings, I will trust them and trust my instincts in who to trust and who to hold at arms length.

WILL take risks. I will say yes when I am scared, and I will step out of my comfort zone. I will push myself to be better and I will do things that may not always be easy, but will be necessary. I will make mistakes, and I will own those mistakes. I WILL do things that are scary and out of the norm to challenge myself and be the best me I can be.

Sometimes I will find happiness, sometimes I will lose it. I will not be afraid to lose happiness. I will reach out, I will try to connect and I will make choices that will add to my happiness.

Appreciate the memories.. I will try, yes TRY to appreciate the memories and stop dwelling on the pain.

The pain… Such a difficult thing to let go. I will focus on the good times, the memories that have made me the person I am today and appreciate that all I have experienced. All I have discovered, all the laughs, heartaches, tears, that make me who I am and I will appreciate this.

PROMISE to  learn from my mistakes. I will admit when I make mistakes, correct the action and be better next time. Mistakes will be made, and learning from them shows your integrity and commitment to being the best you can be.

People change, and that is okay. I will still love and support you. If I did not love you, I will open my heart to you. Sometimes people make mistakes, sometimes they come back better than ever. I will be ready to accept each and every person with open arms because people can change. But, you must want to change for you. Never change for anyone else.

But really, what is life about… Life is about connecting. Life is about loving. Life is about experiencing.

So connect with amazing people.

Love every soul that touches and impacts your life.

Experience all the amazing places, people and emotions out there.

Most of all be open to anything, anyone and everything in between.

XOXO,

filling my life with love, life and adventures.